Hello Beautiful One,
I’ve been dealing with shame and guilt a lot lately. As I’m writing this I’m shaking my head because shame and guilt SHOULD be a thing of the past for me.
I have failed, many times. I have failed in life, in love, in health, in so many things. I used to be ashamed of this. I would look at this history of attempts and fall into self loathing. What a world view of how life is!
This goes without saying, but I look at where I am now in life and I see a guy who wasn’t afraid to just go for it even when I was afraid. I’ve taken chances on people, myself, organizations, and all have failed me in some way but my progression didn’t stop.
My Apostle has this saying, “it’s not that you’re doing a lot of bad, it’s that you’re not doing enough of the right things.”
We live in a world so ready to condemn one another. We’re so ready to end careers and livelihoods for the sake of accountability as if we haven’t wrong people in our own lives. We forsake the reality of redemption, but we cheer for it in our movies, books, and television shows. We LOVE to see our characters grow and win, but hate ourselves. Why? I’ve noticed something about myself…scared, clueless, no matter what the condition I am ALWAYS taking chances. Sometimes I know the risk and sometimes I ignore it all together because somewhere deep inside me I know growth is in the struggle. If the worst thing a situation can merit me is “no” then why not?
Failure led me to a bad marriage, but learning unconditional love after my divorce. Failure led me to a dead end job, but opened my eyes to my true passion. Failure led me to obesity, but taught me the importance of caring for myself. What if failure isn’t failure at all, but a guidance system to pivot from. What if it’s a GPS to better and we just have to shift our minds to the reality that failure isn’t bad?
I’m becoming more willing to fail everyday and here’s why you should to…
It means you tried
You guys know that Michael Scott quote, "You miss 100% of the chances you don't take." My quote comes from my cousin, "The worst they can tell you is 'no'". So, you tried and failed? Good! At least you did something!
failing improves your outlook
As a man thinks, so is he. We have been told that failing is bad since grade school, but it isn't! How we respond to failure is so much more important. When you are willing to fail, it says more about your desire to reach your goals. When we shift the mindset towards failure as an adjustment instead, the possibilities are endless.
failure is redirection
The hardest and harshest "no's" I have ever receieved redirected me towards greater things. If every idea I had turned to greatness, I would be a hot mess. Somethings just aren't supposed to work out for you and that's okay! The road map to your dreams isn't a straight line and that's what failure is for. Failure is your GPS rerouting you towards success if you are able to accept it...if you are able to accept yourself.
How we respond to failure shows us how we feel about ourselves. If your first reaction to failure is how you deserve nothing…if your first instinct is to blame yourself…the issue isn’t failure. The greatest part of the fall is when we choose to rise. The greatest gift you can give yourself is getting back up. You are not your past. You are the moment you brushed yourself off. You are a movement and movements change the world.
I love you,
G.E.M. Stone
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